Married At First Sight Australia - Season 13 Part 2 (w/ Daniel Tan)

Sam and make-up artist to the stars Daniel Tan are here to catch you up on MAFS and bay-BE, we have an emergency situation on our hands. BRAND NEW revelations week had these mean girls and boss babes FIGHTING and Alessandra's intimacy week delivers more awkwardness than we can stomach. Who Do Daniel and Sam think will last the distance? That and some Hillary Duff and Housewives tour goss, and over on UNCUT the divas talk Netflix’s America’s Next Top Model documentary, Real Housewives of Potomac Reunion and new movie Send Help. Find UNCUT over on Patreon or Apple Subscriptions. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

This podcast was produced on the land of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin Nation. Welcome to Australia!

SPEAKER_01 0:12

Someone who is such a connoisseur of reality television. The content is hideous.

SPEAKER_00 0:19

Yes, pick that dog hair off that microphone. I need to get like a a lint roller for microphones. Yeah. Um, hello, Daniel Tan. Welcome back to the cringes real. Now that you've Dries Right. Is this the third time? Wow. But who's counting? Me. Part of the part of the family.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

Because I've had three times I've had to try and find a park on this street. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:46

I love it. When people ask me, they're like parking New York, I'm like, the public transport.

SPEAKER_01 0:50

Oh man. I just haven't got a tram in a long time. Give it a go.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

A wild thrill. The things you might experience.

SPEAKER_01 0:59

I'm just I'm just a little girl. I would love that. Roll it roll the cameras.

SPEAKER_00 1:05

You taking a tram for the first time. A mess. A mess. Um, so you didn't get Hillary Duff tickets? No. But you were in the queue.

SPEAKER_01 1:14

So I I originally lined up this morning from my couch at 10 because I thought they came out at 10. And then turns out the queue opened at 1. No. Was it 10? 10, like Queensland time or some shit? Yeah, so I had it roll off with that.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

Um if there's a reason to like be mad at Queensland, it's that. I'll go back to it.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

Um and then the ticket said um opening at 1. So the website will start off at 12.30. So I was in line, you know, in the queue at 12.30, and even now there's still like 11,000 people waiting for tickets. I love this for HD.

SPEAKER_00 1:58

No, me too. But I'm kind of shook that I don't know, I didn't think she'd be as popular. Like obviously with our demographic.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Yeah, but why are these people at work?

SPEAKER_00 2:09

True. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

Give me my tickets. I asked, I saw her when I was like 14. Yeah. And I was in the nosebleeds, so I feel like I deserved.

SPEAKER_00 2:18

Oh no, I'm like in a place of GA or nothing at this point. Like especially with stuff like that. Like, I will elbow not every single little girl there to get to the front. We just got Robin tickets and it was a similar headache, but we did do it. But it was fuck, it was a nightmare.

SPEAKER_01 2:33

Well, I've got tomorrow to give it another go. Yeah. And then that's for the live nation ones. And then if not, Friday to give it another go. All these things, it's fucked. She started selling them yesterday.

SPEAKER_00 2:44

I thought we weren't doing this anymore after like Taylor Swift or whatever. I don't remember like everyone got pissed off. I've never tried. I thought we were having ticket reform. I've never tried the station.

SPEAKER_01 2:55

Like I the last few months I've done Tixel.

SPEAKER_00 2:57

Yeah. Um, in other news, the Countess is here. I'm going on Sunday. Ah! Oh, to Sydney? No. Oh, I'm going to Sydney. You're you're saying the sit the show here on Sunday. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to go on Monday here. But I will also be at Marty Hoopla this weekend in Sydney. If anyone's it. What's Marty Hooper? Is that the festival she's doing? Oh, okay. Yeah, that's how they got it right here.

SPEAKER_01 3:22

Oh I'm like, what? Wait, I'm not unfamiliar though. No, me neither.

SPEAKER_00 3:28

Don't know what you're talking about. Yes, Mighty Hoopla. It's like a music festival from the UK that they're doing. It's kind of like, remember we used to have like uh what was it? Fucking yeah, like that. It's very that bars. Bardot are reuniting for the first time.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Oh really? For like from like 25 years? Yeah, fun.

SPEAKER_00 3:48

Yeah. So that should be cute.

SPEAKER_01 3:50

I just love that Luann is part of a music festival.

SPEAKER_00 3:54

Yeah, well they've they've put her on at like um three o'clock in the afternoon.

SPEAKER_01 3:59

Like it's not, yeah. Did you see that um Amanda Caroline is now DJing from London Housewives?

SPEAKER_00 4:06

Okay, we need to we're soon we're gonna need to start banning like that's that's amazing. But like what?

SPEAKER_01 4:15

I feel like DJing for Housewives is the new skincare line.

SPEAKER_00 4:20

Yes, yep. The new fragrance or the new vitamin patches. Yeah, it's just but hey, that they charge what does Meredith Marks charge? It's like 4k or something for like an hour. It's something insane. Is Paris Hilton cheaper? I reckon Paris would probably be cheaper at this point. She'd probably just do it for the gays for free. Yeah. Like everything, Paris was doing it years before everyone else. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Decades before everyone else.

SPEAKER_01 4:45

Yeah, I love it.

SPEAKER_00 4:46

Yeah, I'm not mad about it, but also it's like, I don't know. Are you going to so they're all coming? So Erica Jane's here. I'm not like I'm not going to be able to do that. You're not gonna that day, no. Um and then who else is coming? Sonia Morgan is coming. I saw that.

SPEAKER_01 5:00

Are you gonna go to that? Uh when is it? Jerry's out. I don't know. Okay, I I don't know. Maybe probably. But I only got the ticket for this thing on Sunday. There you go. By default, because a friend of mine's gonna be in Sydney. So he's like, Do you want the ticket? And I was like, Yeah, I've got Sunday free.

SPEAKER_00 5:17

Great. So So now we're going? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, amazing. Yeah. No, look, I I welcome it. I'm glad they're all coming here. I feel like it's usually sponsored by like Hey U or something, isn't it? Yeah. And there's like some terrible interview about nothing. About nothing, and it's like they're not filming. They're not, or are they? Well, Jill getting fired before anything even went. Amazing. I love it. The Jill stuff was fantastic. Like, as much as you know, I we don't love racism. She's a demon. We don't love uh racism in this world, but we do love watching Jill Coppet. So I'm happy for that.

SPEAKER_01 5:57

Like, like I saw the video that she put up and I was like, what? And then I was like, you know, it's just amazing.

SPEAKER_00 6:05

Doesn't her daughter even in the video be like, Mom, no? You're gonna get her daughter did a statement as well. Yeah. Oh yeah, the whole family were like, we don't know her. And is that any rugs? I've never met cross. The big red eggs and everything. They were all like, I don't know this woman, we've never met her. So freaking don't endorse it. I'd be so mad. Oh well see. So but they've already filmed what is this what's the show called Golden Girls? Golden Girls, Golden Live Live? Golden Live.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:32

Have they shot it?

SPEAKER_01 6:33

No. Oh, so she's she's done. She's already out. Like they haven't even filmed. Incredible.

SPEAKER_00 6:39

They only announced it like a week before. Because I was kind of hoping for they'd shot it, but then they gave her like a sherry pie edit where like you can see like the corner of like her hair in like some shots.

SPEAKER_01 6:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:50

That's or like on London. Remember, there was some woman that was like in it, but they like kind of cut her out. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh my god. Um, yeah. Well, much to discuss in the housewife space, but we'll save uh our thoughts on the Potomac reunion for Uncut. So if you want to hear that, head over to Patreon or Apple subscriptions. I love that it's like an uncut. Yeah, it's uncut. Well, I started it because Big Brother came back and then they didn't they didn't bring bring back uncut. Well I'll cut. I know. Like Yep. Literally.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

I remember like being younger and like Mum going to bed, and I'd just be like sneak out and watching Uncartons with like the volume on like two or three. Same when I used to watch like Cruise Folk.

SPEAKER_00 7:37

Yep. Mum had the deep videos. It was SBS and Big Brother Uncut, and we were taping it.

SPEAKER_01 7:44

I would like turn the volume down to like two. Sit so close that I could barely hear it. But yeah, that was hot.

SPEAKER_00 7:52

It really, really was. Uh alright. Shall we dive into the experiment? This is what the fuck? It's a mess. It's a mess. I mean, it's always a mess, but this year is. Do you know what I'm loving? This year it's all about chaos. But it's chaotic women. Because normally it's-I I love that. Because it's very easy. The tried and true trope of like get a douchey, misogynist guy, put him on camera, and then we all just hate him. Like that's I love that, but kind of getting tired. So I'm loving this year, all the women seem to be unhinged. Oh, and they're all going to be a little bit more. There's I mean, don't worry, everyone, there's plenty of toxic men on this show still, but also crazy women.

SPEAKER_01 8:36

The men, like in like, you know, one of the episodes I saw, like they all when they're like talking like the the ranking kind of thing, but they're talking like the red. Oh, you mean the Revelations Week, which is completely brand new. When they tried to say that was new, I was like, like they seem really supportive of each other. Yeah, oh yeah. They all seem really nice to each other. True. And all the girls.

SPEAKER_00 9:01

There's a brotherhood, but there's not a sisterhood. Oh my god. Yeah. And also, breaking news, Mel is leaving the experiment after 12 years.

unknown 9:12

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 9:12

Before you came over, I was scrolling and that popped up. Yeah. She's not well. Oh. Is she not well?

SPEAKER_01 9:20

Didn't she go through cancer treatment?

SPEAKER_00 9:22

Did she? I don't know. I don't know anything about I don't know anything about any of the the experts.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

Because I think after they finished filming this one, or maybe before this one, she went through treatment.

SPEAKER_00 9:34

I hope it's not that. I hope she's well. Okay. Um I'm wishing love and light to Mel wherever she goes. Okay, so I'm whatever on her. But she does give good. Do you know what I love about her? What she brings to the show is when they're trying to pretend that it's all you know this series experiment. And she does, she does a really good oh no. Yeah. Oh my god. Yeah. Oh.

SPEAKER_01 10:03

But she has also like a really nice, like when she likes what she hears, she has like a really nice warm smile to go with what she's gonna say to them. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If she doesn't like you, she's very like, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 10:19

Oh no. Absolutely despicable behaviour. Um yeah, so where do we fucking start? So since last app, uh we've had two extra weddings. We had Stella and Philip.

unknown 10:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:38

Um yeah, they're like they're sort of like cruising.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

They remind me a lot of that Johnny and Kerry from like if you see.

SPEAKER_00 10:51

They really tested me now. I've only really started fucking with Mass Prof properly in the last few years, but I have seen all of the like highlights. Yeah. But don't test me with names.

SPEAKER_01 11:02

They they came in and they just like clicked from like day one. Yeah, yeah, and they were just like fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're chillers, you know, they took it, they did all the um tasks and they did well. And now they're I think they're still together and have a baby.

SPEAKER_00 11:18

Like, there's 00.1% of people. People really like that guy. No, I don't like what he said. No, no, no. But he gives me the Elliot vibe from last year. But oh, I actually I kind of like him more than Elliot.

SPEAKER_01 11:34

Like just snarky, yeah, like I don't like the comments that he said.

SPEAKER_00 11:37

He said some more horrible stuff. But I think he even admitted to saying those to get on TV kind of thing. Yeah. Because you've got to remember as well, like, those things are said when they're not cast yet, and they're trying, they're all so desperate. He was like, Yeah, I'm gonna lean into being a douche bro, yeah, because he got those British producers back there being like, But if you had to say something nasty about a woman.

SPEAKER_01 12:02

You seem like you are just a funny, like, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 12:06

Yeah, I don't know. I think he's like fucking boring and like a snooze first, but like totally inoffensive and fun. Yeah, but they love yeah, and as we discover now, Brooke is actually the crazy mum, which is wild. Yeah, but um but you know what?

SPEAKER_01 12:22

She's 27, like she's just me 27 yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:27

Me too. Uh and then we had Grayson and Julia who lucked out on the wedding lottery, because they were the ones who got married like at the opera house. I was like, um, excuse me.

SPEAKER_01 12:37

That felt like a last-minute wedding. Yeah. Because everyone was just walking past watching, like there was nothing private about it.

SPEAKER_00 12:46

So and hers was the whole thing of uh just in case you didn't know everyone, I'm a bisexual. Was she at the like the hen the hens?

SPEAKER_01 12:56

Oh. Like were they there? Because there was a couple that got kicked out.

SPEAKER_00 12:59

That's right, and then they maybe they just chucked them in.

SPEAKER_01 13:02

Do you think they just came on in?

SPEAKER_00 13:03

Oh, there's people that got kicked out that we don't even see.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Yeah. Oh they that were like apparently at the hens and the bucks, and they've just given the the sherry pie. And um, you know, like apparently like that's the thing, but that wedding felt so last minute, like there weren't flowers, there weren't anything. Yeah, so maybe that budget was just like allocated or exhausted.

SPEAKER_00 13:26

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 13:27

And they just swooped on in and then Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:30

Maybe I have no idea. I'm literally watching this show and I'm just like it's like, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:38

I'm struggling, but there's just so many episodes that come out, like it is a lot, it's a slog, and they really stretch it as well.

SPEAKER_00 13:47

I find you can just like touch down a few times a week and you're like fully up to date. Yeah, but then every now and then you miss something crazy. But everyone will tell you.

SPEAKER_01 13:54

You could really like lock in in the last half an hour of an episode, like 76 minute episodes.

SPEAKER_00 14:00

It's fucking insane. Like, and I cannot watch it with the ads anymore. It's too much.

SPEAKER_01 14:05

But like to get a 76-minute episode, that's a lot of filming.

SPEAKER_00 14:09

Wow. Plus, they're doing after the dinner party, which starts tonight.

SPEAKER_01 14:15

They filmed for like three or four months. That's the same length as Housewives. Yeah. And we only get 10 hours. True, true.

SPEAKER_00 14:20

There's milking it. They're not well done, like power to them.

SPEAKER_01 14:23

They know what they're fucking doing. Um I can just imagine, like, you can see some people in the morning, yeah, and the bags under their eyes are just like incredible because they just must be it's so cheap as well.

SPEAKER_00 14:36

Like, they're literally what they get a bulk deal on some caveats. Cave scenes. Yeah. Like, but it's so and all the like tasks they do are literally just like in the apartment questions in the apartment price. These are the cheapest fucking show. Yeah. And then they're like cut to them drinking like chocolate flavoured coconut water. And they don't care about coconut water in the wine glass. Did you cock that? No.

SPEAKER_01 14:59

I screamed. Yeah, but I do that, and sometimes I'll add like a shot of coffee to it. That's quite chic. With like a little mudslack.

SPEAKER_00 15:06

A little dirty uh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:09

No, but like I've got the no, but you know what? I in a PR pack I got ages ago, I I they sent me these Armani metal ice cubes. So I chucked that in. That is chic with some chocky coconut water.

SPEAKER_00 15:24

There was just this one shot, I think it was Beck, and she just like put splashed the chocolate coconut water into a wine glass and like swirled it. And I was like, oh is she just sitting there like this? I was like, that is to represent this show is like that. Um so we had brand new Revelations week, which I was like, girl, this is not new, this is the same shit. Yeah, this is reheated nachos, honey. It's the ranking thing, it's the same shit every year.

SPEAKER_01 15:50

Are we kidding? Every year they do the ranking thing, like just all the husbands just need to know. Just put your wife first.

SPEAKER_00 15:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:58

It's so easy.

SPEAKER_00 15:58

Put anyone that you'll do what old Matt didn't just throw them all out the window. That was such a cop out.

SPEAKER_01 16:03

Like if you go and you know, even if you don't think your wife is the hottest one there, just put her first and then I know.

SPEAKER_00 16:09

Well, this year we had a uh dumb asses. A wife not put her groom first, which we'll get to. But um no, I just don't fucking piss on my leg and tell me it's raining, channel nine, with brand new challenge. I was like, what the fuck? Well, and then they like hired some like function spaces at a pub and did uh green flag and red flag.

SPEAKER_01 16:32

That was what that was yeah I don't know all time low. Like I Steve shocked me a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 16:44

Oh, we're gonna get to him. Yeah, what like that was wild. He thinks he's producing the show, but honey, you got produced. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:54

Um, and Mel, like it didn't surprise me, but yeah, the way that she thinks that she's being so maybe she doesn't even realise, but yeah, she it's so sly at how um like gaslighty it is. Yes, that it's like oh that it like it's not even true. Yeah, and what's her name, Stella, like couldn't even pick up on it.

SPEAKER_00 17:21

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:22

I don't know, that Luke guy seems really nice.

SPEAKER_00 17:24

Babe, Luke, I'm obsessed with Luke. Yeah, I think he's the hottest man I've seen in a long time. I'm literally watching the show and I'm just like, I'll have him. Yeah if you don't fucking want him. There was a part of it. Send him my way, Mel.

SPEAKER_01 17:38

He's in a party so gorgeous when they were getting ready, and he was like, Where are those earrings from? She's like, don't know. He's like, Yeah, nice.

SPEAKER_00 17:46

He's like a farm boy, but he seems cool. And he's wearing acne. Oh, he's wearing acne. He's got just the oh he's got a big old schnoz, numbers. You know he's got a big fat dick. I'm sorry, but like I'm watching the show and I'm like, Mel, but what she wanted a blonde surfer boy with blue eyes, girl. Boring. Does she want a grayson? Probably. I don't fucking know.

SPEAKER_01 18:12

Hang out at Wondai being. Yeah, just exactly. Exactly. I I also don't understand the whole I just wanted to be princess. Like Pinkies for girls, blueies for boys.

SPEAKER_00 18:24

When she said that, I was like, okay, but like you're you're you're hired. This show is all about gender roles.

SPEAKER_01 18:31

You can tell that she was clearly like, you know, just like told that she was a princess by her parents. Big time. Up until the day that she left for the experiment.

SPEAKER_00 18:40

Um, alright, so we're gonna go through each couple as of uh today, which is Wednesday, the 18th of February. So tonight is apparently this crazy dinner party. So Soz, we aren't covering that because we haven't seen it yet. But um everything up until then we'll be discussing.

SPEAKER_01 18:58

I saw something on that that Instagram page, MAFS funny about the dinner party. Oh, like the the crazy thing that won't be shown because it wasn't filmed before this dinner party where it ended up with like cops coming with police.

SPEAKER_00 19:15

I don't know, so maybe that's it on that. I always go to fuck with those sites that like have Maths tea or whatever, and then I just end up getting so bored. Oh no, this is that boy that like stores. Yeah, I I know, I know the one you mean. He's real hot. Oh, you think so?

SPEAKER_01 19:28

I mean, I my heart my type right now is heartbeat, so you know, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:33

But then he's like he's like hanging out with the cast. I don't for me, I'm like, that's flying too close to the somebody. But I do like the tea, but it's just never that good. I don't know. And then you've got fucking Megan Pisteto who's like selling us tequila drinks. Who? Do you know? Um, so dramatic. The other map she's she's the she's the one that's like, I've got the scoop, and she gets she does like deep dives on their backgrounds and stuff, and like out them for having like said probo shit and stuff. Oh no, it's amazing. She's like definitely not mates with many of them. Anyway, um, all right, let's get into the couples. I want to start with Alyssa and David. Yeah. Um, so this is their wedding was her going, I'm not marrying you unless you get on your name.

SPEAKER_01 20:31

Yeah, I that see that to me, it was so dragged out that I was like, it's not even fun anymore. Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:38

He doesn't want to but she they've chilled out since then. Like, so they had that, then they went like on their little ski trip and he like broke his leg. Um, but I don't know, I'm still not quite buying it with either of them. I think they're giving clout chasing vibes, which hello. Um, but they are both incredibly attractive, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

And she's got really nice hair, great hair. Like, yeah, is it a wig that's just pre-styled?

SPEAKER_00 21:05

I do wince every time she's like, my name prince! I'm like, oh yeah, it's a lot and then this week she's like got him cleaning, and I was like, Oh girl, last week you made him get on his knee. Yeah, yeah. Now he's cleaning the joint. I'm like, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:27

But she but she seems really like she seems like she's chilled out a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

I think she has I think she had pre-show nerves. Me too. And they obviously told her to do that fucking prank. She did it. Yeah. It made some great telly. Um yeah, she's kinda but like I don't know. And then i i i are they fucking what's going on?

SPEAKER_01 21:48

Surely.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Surely. Yeah. I mean absolutely. But I can't tell.

SPEAKER_01 21:56

No, because it doesn't really it doesn't really like

SPEAKER_00 22:00

pull oh like out from like w where they'd be doing it yeah yeah yeah into like the real world like it doesn't really show that they do know what I mean yeah yeah like they're saying that they are but it it it doesn't I'm not watching an actual couple with them no is what I'm getting at but everything is always smiles in front of the camera yeah um Alyssa is also part of the drama she's beefing with Gia and Brooke which is stunning the term mean girls is being used oh yeah a lot which I'm like this is the season of mean girls they're being mean girls well no don't they call themselves the boss babes that's right boss babes yeah boss babes it's it's very like um yeah it's giving girl boss yeah um I love that term girl boss she o she eo but did like in all seriousness it's actually like a good relationship thing to have people to like bitch about together and I feel like that's what's keeping these two together because they can just be like oh he can be like yeah babe those girls were being mean she can be like yeah they're really mean yeah you're my mate Jerry and parents now clean the house oh the best bit in intimacy week which I died was when she goes yeah I'm really good at like giving I'm a giver and then she cooks him a meal and she goes babe I mean I made you a salmon poke bowl is it giving and I'm like she's actually yeah she's kind of jamais a bit jamais yeah oh yeah absolutely absolutely I never thought of her like that but now I see it and I'm like okay I kind of like her now what what are we seeing there tea leaves what do you reckon's gonna happen um I feel like it will get to the maybe like the the the home stays oh you think they're getting that far no but like you know like where they see like friends and family and I think that will just be maybe the families will be a bit yeah whatever's yeah okay I don't know I I always feel like the couples that do really well up until then that's sort of the moment where it sort of breaks apart a little bit because they're like wait yeah this is this is I'm stepping into your world and I don't like what I see. Yeah fair I don't I don't I don't even know but I I think they obviously try and keep them together for as long as possible to have characters on the show. Yeah well because of the season so many people pulled out in the first like two weeks yeah yeah which is great I when that happens I'm like a shorter season for us I'm like bye wrap this shit up um yeah look I don't know I think they're both gonna go to the end and then maybe call it just before we might do final vows and then it'll go to reunion and they realize they're not into it. But it does things are changing very quickly um this season already um all right next is Stella and Philip who we touched on briefly before he's sexy I thank you I think so too they all did in the lineup thing everyone's saving I think he's his face is a lot it's very like yeah but that body's fucking out of control and you'd hope so because his whole storyline is that he's like a fitness influencer. Yeah well no but the body looks like gymnast yeah it's just too much well because he doesn't see doesn't drink you know he's weighing his fucking chicken like you know his life is miserable to do that last night oh my god but you know he's like do you know what I mean you know he's not like enjoying any meal he eats no it's like for the like fucking macros I can't um I did love so there was another messy gay at a wedding last week we had hello um and this time we've got who was it it was like one of her friends it was like he just wants to be famous he's got why did he mention his YouTube channel I'm like Diva that's all he has that gay is gonna be brought up when the friends visit yeah that gay will be the friends visit the in the ear like in the piece ear piece free to go like how's your YouTube channel going but I'm like I don't know I was a bit like that's kind of mean like sh dude they're on TV like of course he's gonna do that yeah but also like who like if that's his work you know like I don't know of any other platform apart from Instagram yeah where you post videos of things yeah and it's like he had that before the show he's gone on it's like if I went on and people would go but he's got 10k followers exactly it's like well I had that before exact no it's like you also hello everyone is doing this show for exposure. Can we stop pretending with the real fucking experiment please?

SPEAKER_01 27:02

Like whether it's for like you know work or getting yourself out there or exposing yourself to other people so that you meet someone after out of that one.

SPEAKER_00 27:13

If that's genuinely his business his business though it sounds pretty incel vibes how it's like I just help young men. What does incel mean it's like involuntary celibate it's men that like hate women because they they women don't want to fuck them right I don't know it's giving like men's health retreat if you know those videos that come up it's like do you want to go to Bali and like not have any women around to distract you yeah it's he wouldn't he's gone to those he runs those he owned yeah he's running coconut water like circle jerk retreats which like now it's kind of sounding hot but you know what I'll I'll I'll miss I'll miss out on the HD tickets and go to work. It's not our it's not our scene uh but yeah I also love um so my ex is Lithuanian so I sent him the the clip of her talking to her parents in Lithuanian on the phone and he laughed so much he's like those parents were like what the fuck when she told them she was going on maps they were like yeah they're their their voices were saying one thing but their heads were like really they were not placed um so this is being recorded now I don't I can't get a vibe with her.

SPEAKER_01 28:29

I know she's like started a bit of drama or whatever but I'm not getting a huge amount of personality from her just gonna be nonos no I think um I think that Gia will I think G is hard to bring something if Gia's not bringing something out of you like girl yeah yeah I don't know I think she's not gonna come out on top but we'll see I don't know but I do love this whole all the girl drama is like uh you want to say that your relationship's perfect do you yeah yeah it's like but also like yeah but the name of the game it might be really good and I maybe you'll just not like I mean if it was me and I had one of them I like I love it it's so hard to like like bother me that I'd be like yeah it is good like if that's the worst thing that that person's done that's not a red flag that's just annoying the way they're all just trying to knock each other down a peg like it can't be that good yeah I oh you only fucked once did you what's going on it's perfect with Beck because Beck is very insecure so that's why it's amazing television.

SPEAKER_00 29:44

Really sad to watch yeah I'd like I don't like watching it they've like faded into the background a bit we'll get to them in a minute but like I was I'm kind of glad because it was getting pretty dark. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah uh Stella and Philip how do we feel they're gonna fare in this experiment um I think it's too soon to tell honestly like they haven't really given us much part from we did get a button we got a semi at intimacy week which was actually kind of hot yeah but that all of the paintings that they drew that they did again someone went to Kmart and bought a kid's easel painting set and then they like sent it to the hotel it's giving like COVID the way they do everything in the apartment. Yeah it's like can they leave?

SPEAKER_01 30:35

Well I mean I heard that this was like the cast that they had to put on a leash like a tight leash.

SPEAKER_00 30:44

Oh because they were going out and getting shit faced let them go out and just like take the camera crew I mean they would have given so much it would true they need a break at some point yeah release the tapes release the fucking tapes truly if you if you're gonna go out like if something happened yeah film it yourselves guys yeah true and it it is they are trying to like wrap this show in this weird like PG lens as well to get as many eyeballs on it. But it's I wish it wasn't but like the way they're like uh intimacy is about physical yeah connection I'm like shut the fucker yeah like let us know if you did anal I want to know the anal. Yeah who fast who's fucking who's not can we get uncut happening I hate drinking this on camera cancelled forever let the record stay uh you mean chocolate um flavored coconut water that's what we're drinking uh yeah I don't know it look it was hot seeing Philip get a little semi during the painting task um I will admit uh all right Brooke and Chris is next their painting was of a uh a dead dog I'll say I've painted your dead dog I was like you fucking bitch I I don't like her I don't like her at all I at the first like I liked her at first because I was like oh you know she's yeah like yeah like she's got like a decent moral like at first up until yeah well we didn't know anything about it because all we knew was that she was outraged by what he said which like correct but that's a and like anyone would do that and then I think when it went to like that green flag red flag that's where it sort of popped off and I was like I don't like how you're trying to wrap everyone that was like a different person. A different brook entered that do you think she drank before maybe maybe she did a little Meredith Marks popped a little alleged benzo. Yummy yummy drank a few shardies yeah she was a a different person at that green flag thing just like heckling from the back I was kind of like here for it but I was like who are you sorry who are you yeah up until then she had just been like this gorgeous with like you know picking out like pointing out when things weren't like right in terms of like language toward other people fair enough I like that and she looks like she's walked off the set of Australia's next top model yeah yeah also a short wedding dress I don't know in the rain yeah I mean she looks good but oh my god she did uh yeah I don't know it's clearly they're done right like I just this whole thing so Chris is not hot enough to be behaving in the way that he is but I'm still I can't it's the ears I'm into that me too I was saying this my friend the other day I was like it's the dumbo we've me like I like the I like the big ears that stick out and not gonna lie so cute love a bit of like toxic footy boy energy no check my porn search terms um but yeah no obviously getting he's gold for maths because you you cast a man like him he's like I love his whole excuse oh I've never really been around women I've just always been in like the footy club it's like sorry have you walked this earth before but also you've got a mother exactly but also like Brooke pointed out that she told him to call his mother and tell her what he said yeah which I was like actually that's where was that on camera like did you did was that filmed I'd love to see that yeah but maybe not all we got was Brooke on the phone to like her sister or her friend being like I said like fat chicks are gross and fake tan the fake tan thing I was like sure maybe the insecurity part or whatever but like not liking fake tan on its own I don't understand how that's controversial to be haze you know what like I don't like fake tan because the smell yeah I don't like it I love the result of it and it looks shit and I don't want it on my couch. I mean I like how it looks sometimes when I don't do it myself because I can never and the hands thing I totally get but then to say like oh everyone that does that is in skirt like sure that's probably not nice but it's not like I don't know I think they were stretching it out with that. Yeah yeah but oh yeah but then to be like oh that needy people yeah see that's where like it's not but gold they would have been rubbing themselves at Maths HQ when he came out with that they would have been like great as soon as he would have said that on the show their audition he would have been like cast cast yeah done yeah and they're like we're gonna drop it and then because that's the thing then straight away they're like here's the the tapes yeah the audition tapes do they always do that usually it happens a lot later later yeah they wanted to be the end they wanted to really did anyone else I can't remember there was G was upset about Scott saying that he stuff about the kid the kid yeah she was like but then they got over that in like a second but also like fair enough totally fair enough and the best thing of that was when I think to this day he doesn't know the name of this child. Do we know but I love the producers being like so what's the name the child and he's like oh fucking I know she just calls her my daughter or but Bubby or some shit I was like the daughter's name is Bub right's name is daughter love daughter uh yeah I think Brooke and Chris are actually done like at the end of um last night's a happen well no it just seemed like it was done so um she wasn't feel look if if um some face masks and cheap sparkling in the bath doesn't work which is what you truly want that I'd be happy with that Chris come to mine yeah sure yeah if Chris wants to bring yeah bring those big ears over a bottle of Aldi sparkling and some face masks I'm down it's not bad not so terrible yeah and those big ears oh yeah they're they're let's see later I reckon you don't think they're gonna continue I don't know I think I don't I don't think producers will let him get away they have this amazing way of like making them stay fully like Stockholm syndroming you into staying on the show it's actually masterful yeah in like a manipulative no totally like it there's something like everything will lead up to yeah you know like with what happened at the last like the commitment with Luke you know oh are we gonna talk about yeah let's let's go to Mel and Luke now okay perfect like at that commitment ceremony where like the way that he was treated yeah I you know he should be writing leave uh exactly it doesn't make it but then he goes oh I just want to I don't want to leave it like this he was pretty much saying I just want to prove that I'm like this perfect guy I find his voice really hot as well yeah but not for TV he does not have a TV voice that was a producer's way of like they would have told him you have to stay 100% they probably offered a little bit more money like if you stay this week we'll offer you more money yeah to be tortured by this insane woman let's fucking talk about Melon look oh my god I don't like her she's fucking insane man insufferable and also imagine if a man had said yeah I drove past this girl's place like all these times Colton from uh The Traitors yeah Lisa Runner will be coming for you darling like if that was a guy exactly that on camera like police would be intervening I love that when she was like yeah I'm pretty normal except this one time I just like stalk max and just like we would do just little cute drive bys I'm like excuse me like you know yeah sure funny no no but like I just think like if it was on if he had said that yeah she would be calling producers cops would be called and there'd be like a safety thing put in place it's totally also is she blind he is a fucking specimen yeah and I'm just like every time I'm watching it I'm like how are you not riding the shit out of that night one I would be like they're insane on Luke I'm sure there's a lot of people and he's like love he's like working on his dead dad's farm and he's I know he seems very very lovely. I'm like radicalized by my Luke love and my Mel Hate uh no I'm not buying their change of tune either as well like when the the experts are like oh yeah give it a go even their little shakedown of her at the commitment ceremony it wasn't hard enough they were just like you need to learn some things and oh we didn't get you a blonde guy and she was like eh with her dead eyes I but you know what like and it it happened on a lot of people it happened on Potomac yeah but it did we're getting to that no but like when people suddenly get the like the the criticism like pointed at them yeah the voice just goes very like oh yeah no I'm so you know like it's just like you're not the victim here like you're the one that's actually making these shoes yeah yeah like oh my god when he cried I was fully erect like you into that what and so was like all of Australia there was a lot of women sliding off their couches to that scene I reckon a gorgeous sensitive man being tormented by this succubus I love it I'm living for this show where do you think they're gonna go well I mean another week who knows did what does she want like does she realize like they're not just gonna give you a different guy like what is she sticking around for she ever watched a full season of the show or do you think she's like seen the weddings I don't fucking know because what she wants is not coming out of this show. One other thing on the intimacy week so they finally had a long hug did you say this on intimacy week uh should have been which I know I was only which was cute again I didn't really buy it but sure uh but when they got the note Luke was like oh um how do you pronounce this word uh hola hola I was like he's so dumb and hot yeah I love it I love him observing just like a gentle little giant gentle giant all right let's talk about Julia and Grayson these they're my least favorite give a picture of them on your these two bisexual and the guy that these two I actually fucking can't with these two I don't really have I can't an opinion like they both see the intimacy week of her asking all the I was like that's fucking weird. The way they talk to each other I'm like what is this? It's like he seems really lovely. Does he I don't know he seems kind of like a wet blanket I don't know maybe she decides I don't know say less yeah yeah no he's handsome but like sometimes when the camera stays on him for a little hour the cracks start to show and I'm like that's like when the filter light you turn your head a little bit too high the filter light disappears. He's also very just like generically handsome in a way that I'm like whatever. Yeah she fucking just talks about herself nonstop though like if she fucking says she's bisexual one more time I'm gonna kill myself no I know it's like she we got past purely on that. And then they gave her like this guy I'm so okay you should have had the first couple where it was like uh what's the like what's the word for three like a thruple yeah well it's a thruple you know like it could have been like in a maths first we've paired her with both a bride and a groom but why not fuck yeah why not why not like nine would never um but when she was like it's me I'm bisexual and I'm sleep deprived that whole conversation where she was like I'm sleep deprived so you have to be nice to me I was like Yeah but I'm I'm gay and I'm sleep deprived I didn't get anyone else's issue. Exactly I was like get in line Diva yeah I don't know that's why I'm drinking this yeah their whole thing I just every time they're on screen I'm like they both seem kind of needy and weird and they just don't like each other no at all I think they're I think there is something have clearly been put together yeah

SPEAKER_01 44:00

For the sake of a show to have um a full cast and they're there to just go, you know what? Yeah. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, bye.

SPEAKER_00 44:12

Um, should we go to our token uggo couple, Rachel and Stephen? I actually really like Steven. Me too. I think Steven's cute.

SPEAKER_01 44:19

I like Rachel as well. Actually, like Rachel, I think they're actually Yeah. I think they're really lovely. I I think um Yeah. I don't The storyline is storylining. I don't think he's as nerdy as they've made him out to be. You know how like Beauty and the Geek, how they like give him a bit of a make under? No.

SPEAKER_00 44:37

Because he's Nedape in Puss in the boat yard. Really? I don't know. But yeah, so they're up and down, I loved her. This so this was everything this week with I just want you to kiss me so I can feel something. Yeah, that sort of feel something.

SPEAKER_01 44:58

I I I had a little bit of secondhand embarrassment with to feel something and just the blindfold and the no it was wow. Is that what you're is that what blindfolds are meant to be used for, babe? Like no, oh goodness.

SPEAKER_00 45:10

That was flopperama, and then her dramatic walkout, which was great. She's like, I'm taking the dishwashing detergent because I bought it. I was like, see ya. Yeah, and then her just like coming back, and that oh my god, their kiss was the most awkward thing. I don't think I'd say they finally kissed it. It's still on pause at home. Yeah, oh boy, you're not missing out.

SPEAKER_01 45:32

It's like oh no, she's like, Where was their tongue?

SPEAKER_00 45:37

Well, his was nowhere to be seen. She was kind of just like licking his spice. Yeah, girl, it's bad. But I'm I'm fully in with them. I love them. I want the best for them, I want them to thrive. Yeah, I'm here for you. With Stephanie K. We'll see. No, like, do you think they're gonna fuck? Oh well, not on this show. Maybe I'll be impressed. Maybe. Uh speaking of fucking, Beck and Danny did it once. Okay, alright.

SPEAKER_01 46:06

This guy he's kind of beautiful, but he's also no.

SPEAKER_00 46:12

I mean, the rig.

SPEAKER_01 46:14

That's what I was looking at.

SPEAKER_00 46:15

Yes, and then everything from the neck up, I'm like, I'm sorry, sir. I can't. I would. I would. But absolutely also his vibes are cursed. Yeah, yeah. He's not diabolical. He's oh yeah, he's a demonic. He's actually demonic. Yeah. He's been possessed by a demon.

SPEAKER_01 46:34

I really I really like Beck. Yeah. And like just her vibe in general. Like she's giving great television. No, but like at the dinner party when they're like, talk about this, and she's like, no, I'm not putting that into the world. Like, bad. I was like, Yeah, good. Like you don't want to talk about something, don't do it. Like, you don't have to. Yeah. But no, Danny is evil. I'm sorry. I just have a feeling he's do you remember watching a few seasons ago? No. Um Connie and Johnny. Connie and Johnny? No, I don't remember that. Okay. Um, there was like, you know, he was the one that was like the whole time, like, you know, oh, it's like a bit of a slow burn. I don't know how I feel. I feel like he's the like. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:18

Oh, as soon as they go, oh look, I'm just struggling with the it's like, you don't want to fuck her. No. You had shit sex one time.

SPEAKER_01 47:26

Oh, how bad could it be?

SPEAKER_00 47:28

Like the most embarrassing thing ever. I actually like it.

SPEAKER_01 47:31

See, like, if I ever did it, I would just hope that, like, you know, I'd probably have to have like a quick word off camera off mic and be like, look, yeah, like let's not embarrass each other. Yeah. Just it's wild.

SPEAKER_00 47:42

Let's you know her, just it all started with her being like, You wanna have a take another look at that old woman over there on the G and honeymoon? Yeah, look, I actually can't wait to see what happens to them. I think they're perfect casting, and I'm so locked in.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

I think she's I like how like every like her in general as a person, I think is really lovely, like great for the show, but I just can't get past the fact that it's quite sad watching someone that insecure on TV put with someone who doesn't see the value in her. It's hard. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 48:20

Yeah. Oh, I feel genuinely bad for her, yeah, but also I'm kind of like enjoying her chaos. Yeah. Um we shall see. Yeah. Alright, let's talk about Rebecca and Steve because I have so much to assess.

SPEAKER_01 48:34

I I've only really got the only thing from like the the red flag thing from them. Like, that's this man is horrendous.

SPEAKER_00 48:42

Yeah. Also, is he gay? What's going on here? I don't know. When he's like, I'm actually quite conservative. I'm like, You are not. You're on a TV show. She uh went to a um sex shop, and I'm like, I would have. And that's not really my my scene. Oh, please. He's trying to be like big sensible dad. Me too. I the kinkiest shit must be on there. Yeah. He full slut shamed her for like trying to, but like the task was spice it up, and she bought like it was so PG. She's like bought us like sexy boss bitch outfit, and he was like, I would actually feel really uncomfortable if you wore that. Well, don't look. Well, don't look, darling. Don't look at it. It's the whole thing was yeah, and she's cool. I like really like her.

SPEAKER_01 49:30

Yeah, I think she's very um I mean, she just seems like a mum, like a normal mum. She seems like someone I would have a few wines with and like love. She would love it. So good. And I just yeah, I I think at first I didn't mind him. Yeah, he seemed really nice at the wedding, but they all mostly do.

SPEAKER_00 49:49

When he was like, Oh, well, good he when he's like accused her of like wanting to make t good television and like oh you just want to make a soft core porno and all stuff. I was like, okay, we'll see you. Like you know where you are, sir. Yeah, but like she has understood the assignment.

SPEAKER_01 50:07

Yeah, like we're if we're on a TV show, cool, then like let's not fake it, but like like we're here to make TV.

SPEAKER_00 50:13

Oh no, no, he's fucking cursed.

SPEAKER_01 50:16

Can you imagine like if you were just doing all like the mundane activities at your day-to-day on that show, like you'd be asked to leave.

SPEAKER_00 50:23

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 50:24

Don't want to say happen.

SPEAKER_00 50:25

No, they're doomed. Uh Gia and Gia and Scott I've saved to last. Okay, good. Um I love Gia. Wow. Yeah, she's great.

SPEAKER_01 50:34

The fact is, she's nothing that she hasn't already told you she was from the Hens Knight.

SPEAKER_00 50:41

Yeah. So why is it a shock that she's a bitch? That's the thing. She's exactly she's doing everything. She's Playboy Mansion. Yeah. She's she told them all that she was a bitch. Yeah. She knows she's a bitch. She's that bitch.

SPEAKER_01 50:54

Yeah. But I there are parts to her that I'm like, oh, she's actually quite nice. And since like Yeah. There are moments, like glimpses. I don't know if they've been cut out, but you can see her face when like, you know, some of the girls were talking about like their partners. Yeah. And she's very like smiling and supportive and true.

SPEAKER_00 51:15

That they're oh, she's getting like cunty villain at it at heart. Yeah, yeah. But like it looks good on her, so like, yeah, get it, girl. The thing and I think that's what she's there to do.

SPEAKER_01 51:24

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I the one thing I cannot forgive her for is that fucking mermaid hairstyler in the first dinner party. Yeah. I hate that hair. Yeah. On anyone.

SPEAKER_00 51:37

Yeah. I I know. And she needs all the help she can get, so I'm kind of like, Yeah, but it was almost like all pulled forward. Like, no. She looked like a blonde version of the ring. And then how do we feel about Scott?

SPEAKER_01 51:50

I like him. I think he's hot. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:53

Like, would love to see. He's a bit too G C for me, but I'm kind of into it. From the GC, so you know that's nostalgia.

SPEAKER_01 52:00

The type that I grew up looking at.

SPEAKER_00 52:02

Apparently, used to have OnlyFans. Yeah. If anyone can find it, my DMs are. I want it. I'll I'll I'll I'm on it. Uh yeah, I feel like they're our controversial couple, but it's all waiting to pop off.

SPEAKER_01 52:16

She's the only one that's been controversial.

SPEAKER_00 52:18

Like he's I think they're both there for the spotlight. Let's be fucking obvious. I just like how they keep calling themselves a power couple.

SPEAKER_01 52:28

Oh, yeah, power couple.

SPEAKER_00 52:32

Yeah. I did love um intimacy week her telling him what to do in his little jokes. That was cute. Yeah. Uh love it, love their matching veneers. Yeah, but hers is so white, they're like they're blue. Yeah. I can't wait to get some.

SPEAKER_02 52:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:50

Oh, so what's happening tonight at this crazy dinner party? It better be good because the primary is like, this is the craziest thing that's ever happened ever in the history of the planet.

SPEAKER_01 53:01

Well, so apparently what happened at this thing that was where the cops were there? Yeah. Um, that's where, like, you know, because this guy was having dinner with them and he was saying like friendships like fell apart there, like because of their I don't know, but I'm sure a turkey slap? But I'm okay. I'm literally just like, what? You did something, bro.

SPEAKER_00 53:25

Yeah, exactly. We'll see. We shall see, but I think things will like just pop up from that. Yeah. And then are you gonna fuck with after the dinner party? Exclusively on standard. I don't have stand anymore either, so we'll see. But I might find it elsewhere on the dark web. Okay, yeah. Alright. Oh well, amazing.

SPEAKER_01 53:47

It's I think look, the season has it's all building up to something where I'm like, yeah, like the I think the retreat is gonna be bonkers because they're totally gonna be in one house together.

SPEAKER_00 53:57

Oh, I can't wait. And I kind of wish it just was that format from the start, to be honest. All this bit at the start with the hotel room task, it's a bit snooze. It could be one or two apps, it doesn't need to be weeks. I know, I know.

SPEAKER_01 54:09

They're getting our coins, but no, but that's how they really break them down because when they're not filming, they're locked in their rooms.

SPEAKER_00 54:15

Losing their fucking minds having talked and hating it, having talked to someone they hate. It's literally the demonic. It's so demonic. Not of God. Yeah. Um continue to listen over on uh Uncut if you want to hear us talk about Little House Ice of Potomac. We're gonna touch down on the America's Next Top Model documentary series. I know we might even talk more about Jill Zaren and some other bits. So uh yeah, find us over there uh on Patreon and Apple subscriptions. And Daniel Tan, I'll see you there. Okay. Bye. Bye bye. Bye.