And Just Like Project Runway... (w/ Stephen Wakefield)

Sam is back from gaycation to Europe and the glow is glowing. To welcome them home, Stephen is back on the couch for some more of the And Just Like That… pile on. There’s also a catch up on pop culture news and a special The Cringe is Real announcement. A not to be missed episode. The gals also discuss Miami Housewives, Big Brother AU’s return and the Beverly Hills girlies coming to the great state of Victoria.  

Find UNCUT bonus content from this episode on Patreon or Apple Subscriptions. 

Transcript

Intro

SPEAKER_01 0:00

This podcast was produced on the land of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin Nation. Welcome to Australia. Ozzy, Ozzy, Ozzy. This is kind of tragic.

SPEAKER_02 0:12

Someone who is such a connoisseur of reality television. The content is hideous.

SPEAKER_03 0:17

So sorry about this. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 0:19

Mummies.

Mummy's Home

SPEAKER_02 0:22

Mamacita. Mummy. Mummy. Mammasi. I'm a mummy. Mammacita.

SPEAKER_01 0:28

Mummy's back from mummed. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 0:30

And I'm back on my meds.

SPEAKER_01 0:33

You are. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:34

About your meds which are fridge cigarettes cigarettes.

SPEAKER_01 0:38

Fridge cigarettes, which is a new term I've just heard for a oh, ASMR. For a dark coke. A DC.

SPEAKER_02 0:47

The old DC.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

Fridge cig. That's so awesome. Fridge cigar. It's gotta be, right?

SPEAKER_02 0:52

I actually think it's American. Oh. Or maybe UK or something.

SPEAKER_01 0:57

Oh a fridge cigarette.

SPEAKER_02 0:58

Yeah, you want a little fridge cigarette?

SPEAKER_01 0:59

You want a little freaking fridge cigar rat? You want a little pee?

SPEAKER_02 1:01

You want a little lime. Three sticks by a fridge cigarette. Yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

You watch Charlie's It'll Fridge she'll be like Fridge Cigar.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

She probably she probably his next album is actually called Fridge Sig. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:19

Yep, I'm back from four weeks away.

SPEAKER_02 1:22

And you're looking so tan obscene. I did. Absolutely obscene. Did you wear clothes at all while you were away?

SPEAKER_01 1:29

Oh, it's illegal. Whilst in Sicily, darling to wear clothes.

SPEAKER_02 1:35

North of the equator. Yes. No cross.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

No, I had a fabulous time. Uh-huh. It was Equal Parts Deborters and Hillen. It was my Hill and journey. Your Hillen journey. I feel hilled. Um, I hope you enjoyed the pre-recorded content that I had free to upload every week.

SPEAKER_02 1:54

I mean, she did she did the Lord's work. She did a really good job at pressing upload.

SPEAKER_01 1:58

Yeah, we did some fun recaps of The Real Housewives of Vancouver with Daniel Tan, which was, I gotta say, like, have you seen that season? No, I haven't.

SPEAKER_00 2:09

Please.

SPEAKER_01 2:13

I haven't done that. No, one season. One and done.

SPEAKER_02 2:16

This was Yeah, it wasn't interesting enough to bring back.

SPEAKER_01 2:18

This one is like fucked.

SPEAKER_02 2:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 2:22

Like what I yeah. I'm speechless.

SPEAKER_02 2:26

Really? Hey you?

SPEAKER_01 2:28

Yeah, it's on there. Okay. It's all on there. I can't believe no one's watched it because it's actually insane.

SPEAKER_02 2:33

I actually really need your thoughts on it. So speaking of insane, I watched, um, I rewatched. I wanted to do something really random, and I watched uh re-watched Rony season eleven, I think. Oh Leah McSweeney's season. First season.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

The first one where she was okay. No, she's like, I'm doing it now, and I'm second singing. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 2:57

The first one, she's like, I'm not drinking, and then drinks everything, and then she's like throwing throwing tiki torches around Tiki Torches around.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

Iconic.

SPEAKER_02 3:05

And it's the season where it's Ramona's birthday with 50 close girlfriends, and they all donate a hundred dollars to buy her a five thousand dollar Gucci bag, and then it gets wild, and Sonia's dancing in a mirror. Um, it is the most insane season. I quite like that season, but of it's it's Dark Durinda's so mean. Yeah, and I was like That's the is it's that Halloween party? Yeah, she's I think she goes on pause after this. Yeah, that's pause. That's what she gets. She gets put on pause. The reason why I went back to this is because I actually watched um I'm up to date on everything. I watched um Ultimate Girls Trip Berkshire's. Is that two? Oh yeah, I forgot about that. I actually didn't watch it. Where Durand is just like so she's so mean, and she mimics people when she when they're upset with her, and it's like she's so bonkers.

SPEAKER_01 3:55

She's like, I knew some people that died of COVID.

SPEAKER_02 3:58

Yeah, oh yeah, that too. I know, I mean they're in the theme, and Vicky was like, Oh, I'm anti-vaxx. Oh, I've got a blood clot, that's why. To which no, and we're like, oh, sorry, yeah, oh.

SPEAKER_01 4:08

I actually try completely forgot about that season, like erase from the memory banks. Yeah, I know. Because the like the Roanie Ultima Girl show was so good. It really was, it really was. They did so well.

It's Leo-Virgo Szn!

SPEAKER_01 4:22

Hey, it's our season. It's our season. Leo Virgo girlies. Let's go. It's all about us. Rat row. Leo season, baby. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:30

I know, and then little Virgo next week. I can't believe how quickly the season's gone. It just goes. It really does. It really does. Yeah. Um, what are you doing for your birthday?

SPEAKER_00 4:41

Look, after Europa, I need Oh, so did you go to Europe?

SPEAKER_02 4:46

Yes. Oh, so excuse me. Yes, hello. That's a bit nice. Hello. What'd you do down there?

SPEAKER_01 4:51

Oh, nice.

SPEAKER_02 4:54

Oh, Sorento Moon. Ah, look, I need to calm the fuck down.

SPEAKER_01 4:59

I need to rain it fuck in. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:02

Maybe a couple of penicillin shots in the butt. Who knows? Yeah. What are you gonna do? Um, I don't know. Yeah, well, you know. Uh look, dinner and karaoke. Yeah, I'm excited about. Me too. I'm really it's a new personality type for me.

SPEAKER_01 5:18

I know, I'm here for it.

SPEAKER_02 5:20

Get ready. Get ready, bitch. Get ready, bitch.

SPEAKER_01 5:25

Got my song loose ready. I did do karaoke when I was in Rome at a bear bar. Oh my god. Um, which is fabulous. I sang Untouched by the Veronicas.

SPEAKER_02 5:38

That's on my that's on the list. I've started to we're going to K-box. I've started to put the list.

SPEAKER_01 5:43

And I picked it because I was like, oh, I know this song. I've listened to it so many times. And I was like, Number three best song in the world. And that had just happened. So I was like, topical, even though like no one in Italy is following that. Plus, I was like, they're Italian, Australian divas. I was like, this feels correct. You love this. Right? It was the correct choice. However, then it the no no no started, and I was like, I don't know. You're like, oh shit.

SPEAKER_02 6:04

And it's fast. It's really fast and it's nonstop. Like it just I know.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

And then I picked the wrong key. I was like, up here, and I was like, so and I was like, I have to commit now.

SPEAKER_02 6:16

It's totally fine. I mean, I've got no pitch and no tone, so I just um go for gold and hope for the best.

SPEAKER_01 6:22

Look, the bears were very nice about it. I'm sure that was like, oh, look at that.

SPEAKER_02 6:27

Little sexy boys singing their sweet shit.

SPEAKER_01 6:29

You were like, you have shot. Oh, you're good. And I was like, don't give me your pity.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

Were you wearing a Speedo?

SPEAKER_01 6:36

No. You're wearing nothing at all. Absolutely. Naked karaoke. No. Um, yes, but so much happened while I was away. Heaves has happened, my god. Okay. We have Where do we begin? Okay. Maybe

BBAU is Back

SPEAKER_01 6:53

we'll start with Big Brother, Australia. Okay. Is back on 10. 10 have been 10 have been hard pushing out content. They're re-releasing like every episode of the old stuff on YouTube. And they're like, let's do a watch marathon. I'm like, watch five million hours of that. No thanks. I mean, who's got highlights?

SPEAKER_02 7:17

Yeah, highlight reels. Come on. I don't need long form journalism anymore. I just need give me the quick bites. Give me the turkey slap and then the eviction. Exactly. They're probably they're not gonna skip that.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

They just cut that whole bit of what? No, but I am so excited that she's back. Um yeah, and it's like they're just doing the auditions now, but it looks like it's gonna start soon. I did ask though, because I needed to know. I think you asked the question on everybody's lips. Which was are we getting uncut?

SPEAKER_02 7:50

And are we?

SPEAKER_01 7:50

Well, 10 left on red.

SPEAKER_02 7:52

How uncut are they are they making this?

SPEAKER_01 7:54

I hope they left me on red because someone saw my comment and then they were like Quick, run it up, run it up the chain. Run it up to Mike Goldman, um, who I assume is the CEO of Ten. No? Um my god, you see his house burnt down, sorry. I should have not been loving. It was literally came up on a on a reel the other day. It was like um famous. It was like TV ex-TV presenter Mike Goldman's House ablaze, and I was like, Oh this is the universe being like Because isn't the Big Brother House burned down too?

SPEAKER_02 8:37

One of the original ones yeah, I don't fucking know that's Inception. Okay, that's wild. Speaking of actually got um TV hosts doing things happening to them. What about the ready study cook guy?

SPEAKER_01 8:53

What happened here? Peter Everett. Peter Everett. Um incredible.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Underoge Underoge things. I know, I know. Oh fuck. I know Crazy Hells. Alleged, alleged.

SPEAKER_01 9:07

So correct. But like allegedly, allegedly, I'm so wow. Okay, that's I'm deep diving on that. Deep dive, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:15

That's what happened while you're away. Fuck. Everything's coming out of the woodwork.

SPEAKER_01 9:21

But look, I thought, look, if channel

Patreon Annoucement

SPEAKER_01 9:23

10 can't give us uncut content, then I will. So I'm OnlyFans who come.

SPEAKER_02 9:29

Subscriber number one right here. Wait, what?

SPEAKER_01 9:31

I'm announcing my OnlyFans. No, I am announcing the cringe is real uncut. Exclusive to Patreon. Patreon, baby. So um, yeah, we'll be doing some uncut content.

SPEAKER_02 9:44

You want to hear some naughty stories? Come behind the paywall.

SPEAKER_01 9:47

Yes, I'm gonna tell Stephen some stories uh from my travels um a little later on.

SPEAKER_02 9:53

We might have to turn the camera off for that because not safe for work or uh not safe for work. Oh, OnlyFans, maybe. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

But yes, I thought it's about time, you know. It is about time in these trying times. Yeah, she's gonna monetize.

SPEAKER_02 10:07

Monetize, diversify everything.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

I love this. So thank you for joining me on my uncut journey as my first guest.

SPEAKER_02 10:15

I'm really excited for that. Um if there's not an uncut on Big Brother, do you think it'll be the pipeline from house uh housemate to OnlyFans?

SPEAKER_01 10:27

Hmm. I think surely. That because normally it's like what maps, pipeline, they pretty much all do that. Mind you, I don't think anyone from this last season did it. We're still waiting. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 10:42

I may watch his space.

SPEAKER_01 10:44

We should have seen what else happened while you're away. Um they

AJLT is Dead

SPEAKER_01 10:49

fucking cancelled and just like that.

SPEAKER_02 10:51

Which I mean, collective sigh positively and negatively.

SPEAKER_01 10:58

Because I wasn't at all surprised, but I was really upset.

SPEAKER_02 11:01

It wasn't long for this world.

SPEAKER_01 11:02

It feels like um what's his name? MPK. Michael Patrick King. Yep. Is like, well fine then. If you're all gonna make fun of it, then I'm taking it away.

SPEAKER_02 11:15

And I'm like, no, no, MPK's like if you don't like this, great. I'm doing a season of the comeback. Yeah. I saw that, which can't I think this is gonna be fun. Quick like 25-minute episode. Yeah, well, it's like a to come kind of style.

SPEAKER_01 11:32

After what he did to Miss Bradshaw, I'm like scared for yeah, well, do you think Kudrow's gonna cop that too?

SPEAKER_02 11:39

Hope not. We'll see.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

I I'm I am like cautiously optimistic about the comeback. But yeah, you're so right. It's like yeah, yeah. We we knew we knew it was too good to be true. Way too good to be true.

SPEAKER_02 11:53

And I think they need to just end just like that movie.

SPEAKER_01 11:57

Yeah, why not?

SPEAKER_02 11:58

Right?

SPEAKER_01 11:58

Why the fuck not? An animated feature and just like that Pat pony pals. And just like that, and it's just the cat. It's Shu. Shoe the cat. It's uh it's like flow, the film Flo, but centered around Shu escaping Carrie Bradshaw's fucking gigantic mansion.

SPEAKER_02 12:22

Oh my god, that house. I know it's I know it's a set, but that's that's what I want. That's a house I want. That's a house I deserve.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

I want to complete with the Englishman under the in the basement.

SPEAKER_02 12:33

Terrible writer who thinks she's a great writer. She's not.

SPEAKER_01 12:37

I'm still I mean, look, we're gonna get into it, but I'm still so confused about the ownership of that structure. It's like, so he did he come with it? Was he in the rental?

SPEAKER_02 12:46

Yeah, she seemed to have bought it and didn't know she had a rent a renting.

SPEAKER_01 12:50

He's like, I'm a troll, I just live here. Uh yeah, this is mine. Oh Duncan Reeves.

SPEAKER_02 12:55

Oh, yeah, that's his name, Duncan Reeves, not he.

SPEAKER_00 12:58

Anyway.

SPEAKER_01 12:59

Um we've also had the return of Heidi Klum on Project Runway, which is she's back so good. And we will be talking about that. But we'll be talking about it. That's right, in Uncut. So get over there if you want to hear us talk about um all the crazy shit happening. Project runway. And the other

Beverley Hills Comes To Country Vic

SPEAKER_01 13:20

huge news is that fucking the Beverly Hills housewives are coming to not Melbourne, but Victoria. Thanks to some great journalism by the Herald Sun. Why it seems like they're the only people. The only ones that think to that?

SPEAKER_02 13:38

Yeah. It's what do they know? It's very it's weird. There must be elite.

SPEAKER_01 13:44

They've tried to book something. But so do we think they're doing because clearly this is like some regional Victoria. Oh, definitely. They'll be off terms. They couldn't get the Commonwealth games, but they got the Beverly Hills girls. You think it's Alba?

SPEAKER_02 13:57

I reckon it'd be Alba Peninsula. Um could be Bray.

SPEAKER_01 14:01

Could be the other side. Oh, yep, yep, yep. Could be Grey. And like the like, I don't know. Cause it's it's cold. Yeah. I mean, when are they coming? I think they well, it was supposed to be like this month, and then and then the Herald Sun did a follow-up report saying, Oh, the girlies have pushed it back.

SPEAKER_02 14:20

Yeah, interesting.

SPEAKER_01 14:22

So I don't fucking know, but who knows? Will I be stalking there every moment? Absolutely lowly.

SPEAKER_02 14:29

I think everyone will, and people will be posting like, oh, here I am with blah blah blah, and here I am with Dorit, and here I am with um who else is in the cast now? Erica Rachel Zoe, new edition. True. I'm not really I don't really care about her, but she's going through a divorce. Oh all right, sign me up, I'll watch that.

SPEAKER_01 14:45

And then Denise Richards back, and she's been divorced.

SPEAKER_02 14:48

So is this really a year of things returning, people returning.

SPEAKER_01 14:52

Andy Cohen saw that black eye pick and was like, get get the contracts ready.

SPEAKER_02 14:58

Like oh my god. Seriously, hectic.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

Anyway, and you're

The Real Housewives of Miami

SPEAKER_01 15:05

up to date on Miami, which I'm loving this season. Uh Miss Gertie with the texts. I was like, That was honey.

SPEAKER_02 15:14

Well, I didn't want to ruin the surprise, but for my birthday, I'm gonna be releasing texts on the karaoke screen. And I'm gonna make people sing them.

SPEAKER_01 15:21

That's actually a great idea. Imagine you're like you go, you go backstage at the karaoke bar to the like Imagine and you're like, hand them a phone. Yeah, um I need this, I need this on the screen.

SPEAKER_02 15:33

Let me speak to your tech operator right now.

SPEAKER_01 15:35

Halfway through me doing untouched, it just a tech flash and everyone's like this. Everyone's like, What does it say? I just loved how long it took everyone to read it, and then it was so flop.

SPEAKER_02 15:45

It was so flop, but it also is so amazing. But it is actually so I'm new to Miami. This is the first season I've watched. No way. I have no context of anyone. I know there's like the fake Kardashian girl, then there's the um the oh, what's her name? Like a Marisol?

SPEAKER_01 16:03

Marisol's my favourite. But she's very quiet. I don't know. I'm obsessed with it. I don't know. So she's not this season, she's pretty quiet. She does so much heavy lifting, but is not a main cast member. Okay. Same with Adriana, yeah, same with Kiki. They're like, they could be and they should be like all the time, but they're not.

SPEAKER_02 16:20

Yeah, interesting. But maybe it's kind of better for they're better. I love Kiki. Yeah, as like supporting characters, and they pop in and go, What why are you saying that? Um, but who I dislike on the show is the new girl. Stephanie. Oh my god, shut up. We don't care how rich you are. You keep telling us how rich you are. It sounds so fake.

SPEAKER_01 16:38

It sounds so dumb. That house that they're building. I was like, this looks disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 16:42

It's the exact same house as before. It's just bigger, like bigger. Like oh, she's so weird. She's fucking some old rich guy. Or she's trying to she's like trying. Also, sorry, I just had a like a little brain flash. I read that um that how she met her husband was that she was his ex-wife's assistant.

SPEAKER_00 17:05

Fuck off.

SPEAKER_02 17:06

Yep. And so she used to be her assistant. I can't wait for them to come out on the show. Yeah, well, it's um because you know the girlies are gonna go hard. They'll go hard, yeah. Um, and yeah, so they um had like an affair, and um that's how they met. Great season. Which I was like, I that makes me like her. Love it.

SPEAKER_01 17:25

I've got to say, of all of the franchises, I think it's like the most consistent because they're just always at like a hundred.

SPEAKER_02 17:31

Yeah, there's nothing like Salt Lake's kind of that way, just like true. They're always showing up for work.

SPEAKER_01 17:36

But Salt Lake, like unexpected things happen, and it's like, well, whereas I feel like Miami's just like they are con it's they never change their opinion on something. It's like I fucking hate you. Yeah, like Marisol and Adriana, it's just been going on forever.

SPEAKER_02 17:49

Was Adriana the one that was over the yacht yelling, you wrinkly knees, you disgusting, ugly, wrinkly knees, look at your knees. I was like, okay, we are attacking a woman about her knees. Okay, great. Incredible. Um, that is incredible. I think that has some it's got mileage. I'm I'm I'm kind of in for it. I don't, I really don't like um Navatilova's Julia. Julia. Julia, she's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 18:19

I mean, look, this is not her best showing, I will say. But I also gotta say her.

SPEAKER_02 18:24

Her throwing throwing water on Gurdy's face and how much like that actually shocked Gurdy that every interview she's done since she's like breaks down in tears. Good PR girl, she knows how to narrate the story. Julia can fucking cry on the show. But it's so I'm like, this is so good. It's making her look so like Julia looks so bad.

SPEAKER_01 18:44

Um I love Julia, like as in but she's great on the show. The way she's got this compound with like goats and chickens and shit running around like it's amazing. It's really aspirational. I don't know, like, aren't you tra isn't um probably aren't you trained? Well, speaking of Carmen Carrera on the show. Carmen Carrera's like, oh my god. Yeah, when she was popping up, I was like her. Do you think they're soft auditioning her to get her? Because you know Bravo wanna be like trans housewives.

SPEAKER_02 19:13

And also she kind of say seemed to be in like this really dramatic scenes and just there, and it was like, I think they're soft launching her into the show. It'd be amazing. I th she's gonna be able to do it. Imagine they just fast track her to housewife, they will yeah, they move Julio off and her in the upgrade.

SPEAKER_01 19:37

She didn't serve too much in any of the scenes, but I was just happy to see her.

SPEAKER_02 19:43

But they also might the s part of the soft launch might be to be like this gentle, um, like, oh, here she is. She spent some, she's not fighting with anybody, she's just there. True, and then she'll get in the mix in a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 19:58

Because she has been a housewife for years. Like, I love she like stopped being a drag queen. Yeah, she's like, now I'm just a fabulous woman, and then Leah married some guy.

SPEAKER_02 20:07

Sindadu is like the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. Like she's when she's on screen, I was like, Oh, all the rest can oh, she's that is that's that's gravity. That's a gravity.

SPEAKER_01 20:18

I don't know if she's gonna start shit. I think they expect her to, yeah, but I don't know. I think she's actually pretty chill.

SPEAKER_02 20:23

Give her time, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

She'll do it. She'll do it.

SPEAKER_02 20:26

Yeah, um, I'm also up to date with uh OC.

SPEAKER_01 20:30

OC, which I'm not, because I'm not gonna lie, like I only had you know limited time to watch shit on holiday. So I was too busy.

SPEAKER_02 20:38

It's not worth it's not worth like watching on a holiday, it's not really worth watching.

SPEAKER_01 20:43

I was getting bored, even just the first few apps.

SPEAKER_02 20:45

I was like, I was like, okay, we've got lie detectors and shit coming like Tamara is truly one of the most awful people to watch on TV. Just because she makes sense, she's so rude. Yeah. Um and then I was like, yeah, she just yeah, just just e like an evil person, and just seems to like start all this weird shit with people. Um but I do really like there's a newer housewife on there, her name's uh Jenny, I think. I can't no Katie, Katie Janella. Yeah, Katie, yeah. And she too is so beautiful. I could just sit there and just watch her, just do whatever. She like does all this weird stuff and then gets caught in lies.

SPEAKER_01 21:30

But she's beautiful, I love her. Yeah, I need to get rid of it. Oatsy, I find the hardest of all franchises to connect with. I just I don't like any of them. I know they're all super trumpy and gross, and I just I can't fuck with it.

SPEAKER_02 21:44

Like every you know what I mean? Like But then there's also um those what are the two uh Gina and uh Gina and what's the other Emily. Gina and Emily there they they need to be replaced. I don't understand what their their value on the show is not.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

What are they doing there? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:01

I was like, this is snooze town.

SPEAKER_01 22:04

Her tagline last year was Emily's was um if you're gonna um something something at least hand me a taco.

SPEAKER_02 22:15

Oh yeah, so weird sucks. Yeah. I couldn't tell you what it is now. It's probably like can't even remember, but I don't even know why I'm here.

SPEAKER_01 22:22

Yeah, but I don't think I've even gotten to the taglines. Yeah. Yeah, fair. Fair, fair fair. Okay, I'm glad to know that I haven't missing out.

SPEAKER_02 22:30

My controversial take now is I think taglines are over. I don't think they I don't think any of them are that good. It used to be like people would say something, you know, they'd call back to the season before and it'd be, you know, life isn't all diamonds and rose, but it should be. It'd be like so good now they're like hand me a taco. It's like no.

SPEAKER_01 22:51

Now they're all thinking about well, now they're all writing books too, which I'm like, please can we just please stop doing it? Just give me a Kim Richards book, I don't care. That's the only one I want. What would the title of the Kim Richards book be?

SPEAKER_02 23:04

It'd be in Spanish, and it'd be when she's like, Oh, don't chorcho, and it's like, oh, you um aren't speaking Spanish at all, but I guess you think you are I want that book.

SPEAKER_01 23:21

I would read the shit out of that book. And at least you see Dorite's book title. It's like Unburdened. The truth, the eyes, the kitchen sink, the table, burdened, the story, the woman.

SPEAKER_02 23:34

Why is she burdening us with the book?

SPEAKER_01 23:35

It's I feel burdened just knowing that it exists.

SPEAKER_02 23:38

It should just be called Here's three hundred pages of no text and a picture of me at the front. Oh, I don't think for me, I'm like Dorite's just not a star. No, she doesn't have a life that I really care about. What's she gonna do? Tell us about her kids, whatever. And PK the fuck away. I always love when um when um Brian Moylan in his Housewives Institute um recaps whenever he brings up PK as like some incredible, awful, nasty tagline. It's like um, I don't know, uh like a PK human segma, and then it's just like the most it's so good. I love that so much. I think it encapsulates how most people feel about uh uh PK.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

Well, now we're sorry, we're caught up. We're caught

And Just Like That Season 3 Episodes 5-11 Recap

SPEAKER_01 24:30

up. Should we um hop back in a time machine to midway through the season of and just like that?

SPEAKER_02 24:36

Yeah, be back, back, back again.

SPEAKER_01 24:38

I think last time you were here, we were we were halfway through the season and we were talking, and we had just met like Adam the Gardener, and we were so convinced, like everyone at the time, that he was gonna fuck like we thought they brought him onto the show to be like here, Carrie, fucking Aiden.

SPEAKER_02 24:55

Fuck the anti Aiden, and he was like, He was like Aiden from years ago, and boy were we wrong.

SPEAKER_01 24:59

Right mainly because this show is just fucking ridiculous.

SPEAKER_02 25:04

I mean, when they go to the karaoke episode, the birthday, I mean, there's so much to unpack here.

SPEAKER_01 25:08

The way he sang Betty Davis Eyes the same week that Jojo Siwa put out, I was like, what the fuck? How did they know? I thought I was living in a simulation.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

It felt like that. It was really, really incredible and bizarre.

SPEAKER_01 25:24

Um yeah, so Adam, I was so convinced he was there for Carrie. I love that he was there for Seamer.

SPEAKER_02 25:31

Because do you know what? I want a show about Seema where they really let her rip and not let her just be so like silly on the side. I think we've got like you and Seema would be friends. I love in real life, get me in the because I actually have a I have a friend who is Seema, and you will hang out with her on Saturday night. And you will know exactly who I'm talking about. Um the biggest Sima credit person.

SPEAKER_01 25:54

Yeah. Totally, which is a huge compliment. Huge compliment. And I love she's getting dick down. I love this storyline. I love that Adam was able to just through his hotness, yeah, like change her a little bit, but like she doesn't realise she's being changed. Yeah, but she's finally like comrade. Actually, it's like the only storyline that I like genuinely like of this.

SPEAKER_02 26:16

I was like, I I and just like that should be the vehicle for SEMA. Like, just do that.

SPEAKER_01 26:22

I love them just like fucking in the shower. Oh my god, incredible. Like, because you know I'm a fucking pitch over here. So that whole pit storyline, I was like, thank you. Give me give us this. Yeah. Um, even though I love that they thought they were being so edgy, like talking about Deodorant, and I'm like, wow, really real issues on television.

SPEAKER_02 26:46

Yeah, I think it's funny that they've really made that show and they tried to make it, you know, um accessible for a Gen Z audience, but they're not watching, they don't even know what HBO is. Oh they're not they're not watching it at all. True.

SPEAKER_01 26:59

So why why deviate so I feel like they've tried to appease for millennials, yeah, but then w we're also kind of just like come on crap.

SPEAKER_02 27:09

Give us something else, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:11

Yeah, and just the plot just the right like oh my god, we haven't even gotten to fucking LTW's dad dying twice. Like, come on, and the way that the writers double down on that, and they're like, no, it was the stepdad. I was like, shut the fuck up. You you had an opportunity to go, do you know what, guys? We take a lot of meth before we write this show, and the and you know what? That's just how it is. Like, they could have come clean, yeah. They really and gone, you guys are right.

SPEAKER_02 27:47

Like, oh, they should have just been like gaslighting us further. Ha ha ha. Yep. Who cares? Yes, keep watching it, little piggy. Yes, like who cares?

SPEAKER_01 27:56

He's fucking streaming this absolute shit. I would have been like yum yum. Okay. So good. Yeah. So we get Duncan Reeves in episode five. He appears from under the bridge. And she's like, Carrie's just like, okay. Oh, oh, you come along with the house. She's like, excellent. And of course, it's like, I love how he's this is like an American's view of like a British person.

SPEAKER_02 28:24

He's got a pipe. And corduroys. Yeah, he's like an English teacher.

SPEAKER_01 28:29

She looks like an English teacher. Smoking. He's just missing a monocle. Yeah. The Thatcher. Has he written multiple books about Thatcher?

SPEAKER_02 28:38

And I'll write it in New York, the only place I can write. Uh yeah, cuz right?

SPEAKER_01 28:44

Because exactly. Because the last thing you would want if you're writing a book about Thatcher would be like, oh no, access to like archives and things that are all gonna be in London. Like, are you fucking kidding me?

SPEAKER_02 28:56

It doesn't make sense. It's so bizarre. Yeah, lazy.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

It's holier than a piece of Swiss cheese. But here we are talking about mine. Then there's they go glamping, which I was like, that was again who are they writing this for? Like, do they think that people are doing this? Are we supposed to be like, oh, remember when we went clamping?

SPEAKER_02 29:24

I'm glamping right now. Yeah. Yeah, like it's bizarre choice.

SPEAKER_01 29:30

Then we learn about Charlotte's husband's cancer diagnosis. Yeah. Which I'm like, just as Harry. Yeah. Poor Harry.

SPEAKER_02 29:42

Poor Harry, but like They love boiling these men down in this uh re-reboot to just be these like prostate cancer, tick.

SPEAKER_01 29:50

I've heard that's a thing that happens to men.

SPEAKER_02 29:52

Like, um, what do men die of?

SPEAKER_01 29:55

Do men die, especially like old bald men. And then they and then they get to talk about like erectile dysfunction, which they love. But also, I think like there's so much to unpack.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

But when they um they decide to tell anybody, and they're like, oh, don't tell anyone. It's like, but I had to tell Carrie, and he's like, Well, I had to tell my personal shopper that you knew nothing about. Oh my god. Like, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_01 30:21

Like, I thought they just made Charlotte into this like absolute, like demented, like mess. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:29

Like she's walking around like oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:34

Like just constantly like, oh like I'm like, sorry?

SPEAKER_02 30:38

Yeah. And even how she speaks is like um and isn't it amazing? And you're like, who's she talking to?

SPEAKER_01 30:48

The the bit when LTW rocks up after he's had his like surgery, and she's like, Oh, I bought you some jumbo nuts, macadamia's of course, from Hawaii.

SPEAKER_02 31:00

I was like, Oh my I actually just like I screamed, but I was like, no, but that's a hangover from the original Sex in the City when Steve had to have one ball taken out. That's right. And then everything was like one ball. And Samantha's like, one ball to go in my shiny ball pocket. And it's like, yeah, that was funny, subversive, and weird. Trying to do that again camp. And then they're trying to I don't know, recapitalize it, contextualize it. I don't know. Very, very, very bizarre.

SPEAKER_01 31:32

Then we have this fucking like piss yellow gin storyline with Joy and Miranda. So like Miranda is like finally getting to know Joy, and then it's like, oh, I of course I haven't told her yet that I'm an alcoholic, but oh boy, are we gonna test that with this disgusting putrid gin? And then again, they've written Joy as uh an American view of a British person who's just like, oh, just jolly good, just booking gin.

SPEAKER_02 32:03

Yeah, do you remember when they had the dinner party and everyone was such an asshole? Oh my god, those people at that house were vile.

SPEAKER_01 32:11

Remembering backdad.

SPEAKER_02 32:12

Oh, yes, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:15

But Joy, I cannot stand Joy. Joy's the most horrible, horrible character.

SPEAKER_02 32:21

Yeah. Like I think Miranda needed to end up with Rosie O'Donnell. There's still time, but maybe that's next joy.

SPEAKER_01 32:32

I'm gonna Times Square.

SPEAKER_02 32:34

That's it. That's that's I think that's where how she needed to end up.

SPEAKER_01 32:37

Picture this, it's the final scene of next week's final episode.

SPEAKER_02 32:41

And they meet at the Wicked for Good premiere.

SPEAKER_01 32:44

Just at Times Square.

SPEAKER_02 32:46

Times Square. They meet at Times Square. Oh my god, actually, I love this idea.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

Imagine Joy Joy is found dead, um, just mugged on the street, taken out, and Miranda's like, oh well, she was going to meet this nun.

SPEAKER_02 33:06

And then someone goes, How many girlfriends do you have? And she goes, none.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

Stop. Are you secretly on the writing team? Yeah, go out. Oh god.

SPEAKER_02 33:18

I know it's really a time.

SPEAKER_01 33:20

Yeah. Then episode six was called Silent Games. This was when Carrie and Duncan agree to read each other's books.

SPEAKER_02 33:30

Because you know, they're both writers, everybody. And oh, I've got a chapter for you to write, and I loved it. And here's mine. Oh, I loved yours too. Oh god. I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:45

I mean. I know. Um, then we meet Anthony's mum.

SPEAKER_02 33:54

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 33:54

Patty Lapone. Patty Lepone. Who sort of starts with a kind of Italian accent and then just gives up on that like in like scene two.

SPEAKER_02 34:06

I love that Patty Lepone's uh varied career. She goes from Italian to Jewish. Italian to Jewish. Italian to Jewish, and it's like that's her range. And then Avita, who's neither of the two. Um but this is like embarrassingly bad. And for her to actually so you know her controversy recently was that she um, I don't know, uh has microaggressions against um especially African American performers on Broadway, including people who she had recently has said that are her friends and blah blah blah. And um she was disinvited from the Tonies because of behavior. Huge for a legend like her. But I think like for her to call out other people's acting, yeah, you gotta be a shit hot actor to be able to pull off something that someone can't say that you're bad at. Totally. And this act criticize other people.

SPEAKER_01 35:10

Even being involved in this show is like true black mark against your name. Um, just the whole Anthony, so like Anthony on this show, I'm sorry, disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 35:21

And also can't stand why just giving him this like super hot hung boyfriend that's no sense, but also he he dips in between Italian, Russian, he does sound Russian, English, English, it's like yeah, gum me at beakery, but also like slows down so much. Anthony.

SPEAKER_01 35:44

He's had a lobotomy. I was like, you but that storyline sucks, bringing in J. And then she was such a horrible cant. But then and then we were also supposed to believe that she was out here just buying like Basquiats. Oh, yeah. Like she's at the art gallery thing, and she's like, Sh do you have any of the queer masters? Basquiat? Where show me that? I'm like, because that's how art works. You just walk into one gallery and you're like, Where are you?

SPEAKER_02 36:10

Take me to the Basquiat section of the Kmart, please. Bed, bath, and bascuarts, please.

SPEAKER_01 36:19

Like so dumb, like insane, and then this she's that rich and that horrible, and then trying to pay Anthony to like leave my son. I'm like unoriginal storyline, not delivered very well. Also, just not funny, but also not edgy. I don't know. I was like, what the fuck are we doing here?

SPEAKER_02 36:36

Yeah, we're just wasting people's time Aiden.

SPEAKER_01 36:42

Then we get so then there's Aiden, which I just I can't even fucking like where do we start with Aiden? And Kathy? Oh fuck Kathy right off. She's a terrorist, she's a horrible person. Yeah, I'm really not in fucking her ex and getting carried a push Adderall to the farm.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

Bring drugs, you're from the city, bring drugs, which country people do do that sometimes, but also there's plenty of good drugs in the country. Yeah, give me a break, especially Adderall.

SPEAKER_01 37:13

Like also, isn't that a prescription medication? Yeah, so like what?

SPEAKER_02 37:18

I don't know. And the way that Charlotte just was like, Oh, oh, look, we're at a restaurant, there's all these women around. I'll go back. Oh, hi. You remember me? I'm Charlotte. I need Adderall, and they go, Oh, hi, Charlotte, no worries. Yeah, I'll have it delivered to your doorman. Yeah, we're it's on its way. Yeah, so good. So good. Whatever. So good. Not it. It ain't it. It ain't it. Yeah. They should call it and just like ain't it. Ain't it just like that? It's bad.

SPEAKER_01 37:45

Episode seven was called They Wanna Have Fun. And no one's having fun. Nobody's having fun. Larry and Duncan rave about each other's book chapters. Yep. Um yeah, we get Gia being a fucking absolute beast. Chaos agent. Uh, this is when we have the karaoke at the birthday party. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 38:10

And they have like um LTW's like where did the sun come from?

SPEAKER_01 38:15

Also, yeah, where did that sun come from? That scene was way too long. See all the show tunes. I was like, what? They put a lot of showtunes in it. It's because then Rock has a showtune moment. With also that, oh my god, like Charlotte being like, My beautiful daughter is back in a wig. I'm like, okay.

SPEAKER_02 38:34

Alright, shall we go? Yeah. We've just none of these storylines really give us anything we want we need to wrap up or even need to know. Yeah. Like it things just seem to happen and then like happen at Thanksgiving. Then there's a new episode, and you're like, oh, there's more things happening. Yeah. And then you like I've I just can't believe that we all watch this. And now I'm bit realizing.

SPEAKER_00 39:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:05

Maybe we need to log off. No, we couldn't possibly. We need to finish this.

SPEAKER_01 39:10

We have one episode. We've got one episode.

SPEAKER_02 39:13

I'm like, pull myself together.

SPEAKER_01 39:14

So I mean, speak for yourself, doll. I'm thoroughly enjoying it.

SPEAKER_02 39:16

I'm enjoying it too. I like it just on and I like it just there.

SPEAKER_01 39:19

It's it's important to be across these atrocities. It is. It's so we can prevent them from happening again. Again. Yeah. Again. You have to look chaos in the face and go, you know what? I let that happen.

SPEAKER_02 39:36

I'm the girl statue in front of the bull statue in the financial district in Wall Street.

SPEAKER_01 39:44

Oh, then the next episode, fucking Wyatt's move to in with Kathy. I'm like, great, let's get rid of him. Yeah. Let's get rid of that unhinged character. Uh we have Harry recovering from prostate surgery. Um, the art show. Oh my god, this art show with these installations. I die. All those musquiats. The deodorant storyline comes into it. Then we get so LTW is in a different show from everyone else. She doesn't seem to like besides handing over some macadamias, she barely like interacts with anyone else. But her storyline we're getting is like her marriage, hot producer Marion, who like oh has a girl's name.

SPEAKER_02 40:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:34

Um, so we didn't realise it was gonna be a hawker. Very hot, incredibly hot. Very hot. But also, what is this storyline? It's like she thinks there's something there, she's got issues with the husband, and then it just kind of goes absolutely nowhere.

SPEAKER_02 40:50

And also her husband just seems like the most awful person ever. Like he just he just is always so grumpy and mean to her, and she's like, Oh, okay, yeah, just with little aggro eyebrows.

SPEAKER_01 41:07

It's like, oh I'm just like, mate.

SPEAKER_02 41:09

She needs a hot, hot, hot husband. Yeah, he's very well. Yeah, he's done really well. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:17

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 41:20

Uh then like Carrie and Aiden have their moment because he tells her that he's fucked Kathy, and it's like, okay, great. And then Carrie really annoys me in this bit. She kind of like entraps him and it's like really annoying.

SPEAKER_02 41:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:41

She's like, oh I th I never said that we were exclusive. It's like, oh come on.

SPEAKER_02 41:48

Yeah. Girlina. Like you know a Carrie is uh exclusive girly. Yes. She would be tin. Yeah, yeah, it really is. And I think, yeah. I think that she wanted to make him feel bad because it would make him want to be with her more.

SPEAKER_01 42:08

Oh, it was some like psycho bitch manipulative shit.

SPEAKER_02 42:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

Kind of one of the only realistic scenes of the whole thing. I was kind of like, someone would do that. A half. Like yeah, yeah. Keep him on his tools.

SPEAKER_02 42:24

Yeah. Yeah. Um also, sorry, what what about the scene where he like goes to her house and throws stones at the window like he did in and it's like smashes the window, and then she's like, oh and it's like fix you can't fix this. He's like, I'll fix the whole door. It's like you could just fix the glass.

SPEAKER_01 42:46

The like it's trivial things that happen over like material things in this show. Yeah. I'm just like, oh my god, like in New York. Like we we're in New York, really, and we're worrying about this. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:02

Like no one's paying attention to that. Everyone's just trying to hold on for dear life.

SPEAKER_01 43:07

No. We get the whole piss gin incident. Yeah. And Miranda's almost relapses. I we just need a relapse. Come on. Last episode. That's how it ends. Just Miranda relapsing and then just into black.

SPEAKER_02 43:23

With the nun, and that's it.

SPEAKER_01 43:25

Oh, they teased us with it. I was like, do it. Yeah, fucking do it. This show.

SPEAKER_02 43:30

Come on, have another drink, darling. Let's go. I'm into that. I think that would be a really like poignant way to end. Because I think this show is driving us all to drink.

SPEAKER_00 43:40

Oh. Like. Driven a cigarette. This isn't a fridge cigarette.

SPEAKER_02 43:45

This is actually uh uh it's actually bourbon.

SPEAKER_01 43:48

The fridge cig is not even touching the size.

SPEAKER_02 43:51

It really isn't.

SPEAKER_01 43:54

Yeah, I don't know. Then it's like we kind of end that one with Hayden and Carrie and Limbo and Yeah. Is that when she that's when she fucks um Duncan?

unknown 44:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:08

Or is that the next step? I don't know. She jumps Duncan.

SPEAKER_02 44:11

It's a fever dream, really. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:13

But then he's like, Oh, I must go back to England. Well, goodbye. After he finds out that Miss Bradshaw is of name around town.

SPEAKER_02 44:22

Well, also famously, uh when English men come they have to go back to the motherland. They've got they've got a jet back to London. Oh my god. They can't stay, they really can't stay. Yeah. It's um it's a trait.

SPEAKER_01 44:36

Do you think they got that guy because Hugh Grant said no? Like that's how stereotypical the character is.

SPEAKER_02 44:41

Well, and but her and Hugh Grant have been in like films together. Oh, have they? So I'm like, yeah, um who knows? Hugh Grant asleep at Wind Wimbledon. Iconic. That was amazing.

SPEAKER_01 44:55

Oh my god. What happens next? Oh, Seema's worried about her relationship. Adam, I'm like, girl, just enjoy dick.

SPEAKER_02 45:05

Getting dicked down. Who cares?

SPEAKER_01 45:07

She's just making up to be worried about.

SPEAKER_02 45:10

But also, people do do that. Yep. It's actually very, very common trait that people just report to their friends about faux dramas that they're not going to do anything about.

SPEAKER_01 45:18

I did like the bit though when they fucked and he was like, I love you, and she was like, I love you. And I was like, Oh, that was nice. I thought it was gonna be like cut to her with the girls drinking martini thing. He said he loves me, and then like make that drama. But when that was just simple, I was like, Oh, thank god.

SPEAKER_02 45:34

Maybe in the finale they get married. It could be. That would be cool.

SPEAKER_01 45:40

I'd rather that over a Anthony and Giuseppe wedding, which I cannot know.

SPEAKER_02 45:46

I actually even forgot that we just spoke about them like three minutes ago.

SPEAKER_01 45:50

Then we learn about Giuseppe's creepy Geppetto roommate with actually love that. Just this cold dude jerking off over my puppet.

SPEAKER_02 46:03

It's so hot. I hope people have puppets of me. It's so horny. I was like, anyone, I will sit for anyone who wants to make a puppet of me. Um I'm there. Cut go to the uncut section in Patreon.

SPEAKER_01 46:18

Yeah, and we'll be you can you can watch us jerk off to a to a puppet. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 46:24

Actually, that was really that was a really fun little uh plot twist.

SPEAKER_01 46:28

Actually enjoyed that. Me too, because that was a bit shocking. Yeah, I'm like, honey, have you looked in the mirror? Yeah, like people be jerking off of you as a puppet.

SPEAKER_02 46:41

Amazing.

SPEAKER_01 46:43

So good. Yeah. Then they get fucking engaged, which I was like, no.

SPEAKER_02 46:51

And what? They're just gonna do another wedding where they do Elizabinelli singing single lady. Probably. Oh god, this life is long.

SPEAKER_01 47:00

That little bone will she'll rock up last minute. Like it'll be like she won't calm because she doesn't like agree with, and then last minute she'll disappear. I can guarantee.

SPEAKER_02 47:08

And she won't sing single ladies, she'll sing that song. Uh it's always at gay weddings where a drag queen comes out and does the uh lip sync to it should have been me. Oh, it should have been me. It'll be that. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Oh well, we've got that to look forward to. That's that I'm in. I'm like I'm half in, half out about next week.

SPEAKER_01 47:29

Yeah, it's gonna be good. Um, and then yeah, then we had Rock's uh musical number. I thought lot the last episode was very dull, and they're clearly re-edited or something. I think they've clearly like done some bullshit because yeah, sometimes the episode's like 40 minutes, sometimes they're like 20. I'm like, excuse me.

SPEAKER_02 47:50

Yeah, yeah, I think so too. Or they've maybe just cut things out, being like, let's just let's just fuck this pig. We need to get out of here.

SPEAKER_01 47:57

Totally.

SPEAKER_02 47:57

Yeah, editors as well, they're like, let's go, come on.

SPEAKER_01 48:01

Yeah, no. Anyway, well just like that, it's over. I know you're very sad about it. But yeah. What do you predict is gonna happen next week? Okay. I think um Carrie's ordered all these pies for Thanksgiving. Do you think they're all gonna eat the pie?

SPEAKER_02 48:27

They're all gonna fuck 'em.

SPEAKER_01 48:29

It's gonna be like American pie. They're gonna fuck those pies.

SPEAKER_02 48:34

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 48:35

Great ending.

SPEAKER_02 48:36

Um Yeah. I hope so. Let's go with that. I think um I think Carrie will will be single. She'll be alone. Oh, 100%. I don't think she's gonna go anywhere.

SPEAKER_01 48:50

Yeah, and I think she's mirroring the woman.

SPEAKER_02 48:54

Yeah. And I think she'll just be like, I I actually don't need men. I need shoes.

SPEAKER_01 49:00

The pussycat dolls, I don't need a man will start playing. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

SPEAKER_02 49:04

And with uh Nicole Sh Schirtzinger walking down the street. A true star. Uh well, a true Trump star. Oh, well, yeah, well, um dog ass bitch. I'm not into her. I mean, thank you for your service with the pussycat. I can forgive. But now I just can't. Yeah I don't support the fact that she wins that. I know. Well, Frina's always so excited when they come. You found um did she win the Tony? Yeah, which is so crazy. Both of it. Yeah, well, Cole won as well. So all right.

SPEAKER_01 49:42

Well, should we head over to Uncut?

SPEAKER_02 49:44

I'm ready to say how we really feel go into the sealed section. Let's do it. I'm ready for Uncut.

SPEAKER_01 49:50

We'll see you guys over there. Bye bye.

SPEAKER_02 49:53

Bye.